AT LAST!

So I wish I was a bit more prepared than Butch. I admit. I lacked faith. If I knew last night would be the night we’d have been at Seau’s with Butch and P. Bartlett watching the game. Instead I figured they’d lose one or two before making it final. My appologies to Butch and to Red Sox Nation. You see, I married into the Nation. I’ve only been a Royal Rooter since 1998. That year my beloved Padres made the World Series only to be swept. They were even competitive and by all rights should have won Games one and three. Oh well. It’s the past and today isn’t a day for the Padres. It’s a day for the Red Sox. WORLD CHAMPIONS AT LAST.

The feeling? Well for me the closest thing I can compare it to is meeting up with an old friend after a long absence. It’s happened twice. Once with an ex-girlfriend turned friend who I hadn’t seen in 3 years. Then it happened with Butch, a childhood friend who I hadn’t seen in darn near 13. It’s VERY close to the way I felt after Super Bowl XXXVII. FINALLY. All the waiting. All the heartache. The infamous P. Bart and I shared stories of 1986 but unfortunately I didn’t have the guts (or cold heart) to tell him that other than Tom Seaver I didn’t like the 1986 Red Sox. I was rooting for the Mets in that series. I was happy at the end of that series. They won 108 regular season games and had beat the Astros who I had loved to that point. Then starting in 1987 I was a Padres fan and have been ever since. Still…the heartbreak of 1986 he shared. How could I tell him it was my joy at the time? How could I just break his heart like that? I couldn’t. Other than him reading this post, he’ll never know. I couldn’t do that to him. He’s too old.

Anyways…time to work but like a friend of the Sports Guy said…”In March I’ll be walking down the street and then break into a Flinstone Dance for no apparent reason.”

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Do You Hear The People Sing?

Went to see Les Miserables last night. Great performance. It was nice that all the songs were familiar and a few of the scenes (I once had that old PBS recorded performance with the original London Cast). I realized I love watching shows but 1) I hate the seats. Rows are too close together and seats are slightly too small. Victoria kept getting bumped by this woman’s elbow no matter how much Victoria leaned into me. 2) I don’t like waiting around the Dress Circle before the show starts and 3) I don’t like the cattle-like herding that goes on when people rush back to the parking garage after it’s over. That garage scares me anyways with the winding circular exits and just the entrance that is on such an incline people almost backed into me just trying to get their cars up the ramp.

To turn channels for a bit, how long will it take the Red Sox to finish this off? Could it be tonight? They won last night 4-1 and took a 3 games to none lead in the World Series. Yeah well the Yankees did that to the Sox just a series ago so you won’t catch me getting arrogant about it. We’re probably headed to the Bartlett Residence to watch Games 4 & 5. If it goes to Game 6 we’ll head to Seau’s and if it goes to Game 7 we can be reached at Fred’s Mexican Cafe. Home of Game 7 Good Luck. I might just have to bring Butch with me. In fact if Butch is reading this, he’s also invited to watch Game 6 at Seau’s if he’d like. I’ll even provide the ride…since I have to go pick up my father-in-law anyways don’t think it’s out of my way. Same goes for Tony.

Feeling sick as a dog this morning. Didn’t want to call in since I did that yesterday though not due to illness. I had to register my sister for classes at BHMS. Showed up at 1pm to work 3 hours. Big whoop. Now…my hands are numb at the edge, got that nice dizzy-light headed feeling going, little tingle, little head ache, big nausea. Eh, I’ve had worse. Quit my whining, right? Right.

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Is this the beginning of the apocalypse?!

Have the Red Sox really beaten the Yankees in Game 7 after being down three games to none? It took 12 innings in Game 4 (in which the Red Sox were literally ONE OUT away from losing the game and being swept in the series) and then 14 in game 5. It took a man who’s tendon in his right ankle was not attatched to his bone, who had to have it intertwined in his skin to keep it from moving so he could pitch, who literally turned his white socks RED with his blood pitching 7 of the best innings of his life in game 6. It then took us to Game 7 and you can read butchrosser.blogspot.com for the account of Butch and I watching the game at Fred’s Mexican Cafe to relive the dream that came true. A little light in what has been very dark times in the life of one CZzyzx41.

I found out yesterday my mom’s been on drugs for years. My dad knew she was on MJ and crystal but wasn’t surprised that she was also on Crack. I never even suspected because of how against drugs she was on the outside. Maybe the talks came from experience.

My mom isn’t who I thought she was. I’ve been lied too my whole life. Now don’t get me wrong I actually appreciate it but a fact is still a fact like a lie is still a lie. Not telling someone the truth is a lie even when you literally say nothing.

So Victoria and I are going to Montclair tomorrow to meet with a notary and sign an affidavit giving us custody of Rachel for the time being and legal right to act as her parents. It’ll be really weird being dad to my half-sister. Then again I did spend many an afternoon after coming home from school, feeding her the afternoon bottle. We have been close since she was born.

So I’m on the edge of breakdown today. The responsibility, the new revelations, the weight of trying to emulate Christ through this whole ordeal and the realization of just how many people are affected by my mom’s decisions and just how much they’re affected…it’s too much right now.

Anyways. Game 1 between the Cardinals and Red Sox starts Saturday. The Buccaneers suck this year. ARGH! If only they could offer me solace. I have to turn to the Chargers or Patriots instead. At least the Pats are undefeated.

So much pain. Without the Lord…I wouldn’t make it through. He has given me strength. The Holy Spirit has worked as the greatest comforter the world has ever (or will ever) know. My Heavenly Father loves me. I know this. He’s seeing me through this and it pains him as much as it does me…well more cause he has that eternal perspective that I don’t. He’s feeling the anguish and pain of each and every human, animal, plant, molecule on earth and I can’t even fathom that sort of pain.

Well back to work…

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OH MY WORD!

Well it’s happened. I have decided to take my sister from that wretched place. Yeah folks I’m gonna be thrown into the fire. None of this baby to adult crap. Apparently I’m diving right into a year of pre-teen female. Well we’ll deal. Maybe it will be a good way to introduce her to the gospel.

Lord knows it’s been missing from her life. On top of that she gets most of a year in a pretty damn good middle school. Bernardo Heights. Supposed to be one of the best. We’ll see.

So we sign the papers and she moves in next weekend. Gonna try to go see Friday Night Lights with Butch and Tony if they’re interested sometime next week. So if either of you guys are available at all next week or the week after, I’d be happy to hang.

By Referral Only has moved into a new building in Carlsbad. It’s tough getting used to having the entire company there all the time. It used to just be Marketing, Tom, Richard, and Maribel in one suite and marketing was all spread in one room like a nice community. No cubes, just desks. It was so nice. Last christmas we hung paper snowflakes on the ceiling. I’ve got pics if you don’t believe me. We turned our water cooler into Santa. NOW…cubicles. 3 walled prisons. 2nd floor. AND I have to show up BEFORE 7am if I’m going to get a parking space. Otherwise I have to park down the hill and hike up a 1/4 mile to the building. Not that bad? Well you’re not out of shape. You’re not 135 pounds overweight. You do not have a 44 BMI. SO LAY OFF ME!!! sorry. It’s all the stress

Victoria has been sick the last two days. my hip has been hurting tonight. That’s right. I’m an old man. I’m a sick fat old man. ALright enough self destruction. I’m a good guy. I’ll get better. It’s going to be ok. The future’s so bright…I gotta wear shades. yay.

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Gas Prices

What is wrong with oil companies right now?

nationwide gas prices have risen 6 cents in the last two weeks.

In San Diego gas prices have risen 24 cents in the last two weeks.

WHAT IS WRONG HERE?

I’ll find out where the headquarters of Shell and Chevron and other gas companies. They’ll hear from me in many ways. AGAIN. and AGAIN. and AGAIN. until they take care of this problem. In the meantime I will walk and bike whenever humanly possible. We have bus passes. I don’t need to drive. They won’t get my money until they bring down the price of gas. They think they can charge whatever they want and we’ll just pay it. THEY’RE WRONG. We can walk. We can bike. We can use public Transportation. We don’t need their gas. Gas shortage…yeah right. Then why is gas going up at a 400% rate in San Diego vs. the rest of the state and the rest of the nation?

Liars. They’re all liars. They’re evil demons living among humans, preying on us for their own gains. Well when we quit using our cars…they’ll go bankrupt. We’ll force them to bring their prices down. Let’s go people. Bike and walk whenever possible. Quit traveling. If your commute to work is too far to bike or walk, use public transportation. If you can’t do that, only use your car to get to work and back. Let’s all make a stand and not let these greedy corporate sinners do this to us.

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New revelations every day

Well the situation is getting more and more clear. I have information coming from a wide array of sources. I think I fully understand Bill, my mom, my dad, Stephanie, and Rachel. I’m certain I have the truth all there now. I just need a bit more time to think about how to take the truth I know and apply it to the situation as for how I’ll react.

Red Sox are set to clinch a spot in the ALCS today. Right now it’s 2-1 Sox in the 4th with no outs, bases loaded and ManRam at bat. Hoping the Twins will win today since it looks like Vazquez is pitching tomorrow. It’d be good if they didn’t have to go back to New York.

The Cardinals should clinch their spot in the NLCS tomorrow and hopefully the Astros can beat the Braves.

Going to Church Sunday. Sick today but Tony’s coming over after he gets off work. Tomorrow is Donovan’s. Love you all. Tough times but the Lord will help me through it. Just gotta stay in tune with the Spirit. What would Jesus do. All that fun stuff.

Ciao

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Now that the snake is out of the bag

I can now tell you all what’s been going on. It seems my mother who goes by the YahooID sweet_bebe34 is actually 44 and has 3 kids. There’s me of course (26), and my sister Stephanie (22) and Rachel (12). She has been talking to some guy who uses a name something like CHRLSsomethingorother. Mind you she’s still married to my stepdad but she’s been passing herself off I guess as a single mother of one?

Anyways Friday I found out she plans on leaving my stepdad and moving in with this guy in West Virginia…of course taking Rachel with her. Well once my stepdad found out he thought about things until last night when he confronted her. From what I hear from Rachel and Steph (since they live there) there wasn’t any shouting at all. Just Bill hurrying around the house afterwards collecting some clothes and cigarettes and telling Rachel he’ll be at Daves and will return in the morning to take her to school.

When Rachel inquired to mom about what happened, mom said “Danny told Dad and now he’s leaving.” Yes that’s right folks, Rachel already knew. SHE told me. She had talked to this Gene guy on the phone and was told everything and then pressured to keep it a secret until mom was ready to tell everyone. Why put that kind of pressure on a 12 year old? Added on that, she’s blaming ME for her situation. Yeah, me. Her only son. Great mom, huh?

Well mom can’t just up and leave taking Rachel to West Virginia. That’s called abandonment and kidnapping and she could be arrested for it. She’ll have to file divorce papers. Bill will fight for custody (he already told me he will) and what court will give Rachel to mom considering the reason she’s wanting a divorce, huh? If she makes Bill look bad and the court decides neither parent can take care of her, Victoria and I will try for custody. I think we’ll get advice from the Bishop first and see if it’s what we really should do. It’s what we WANT to do. Prayer will also have to come in. Lots of it too.

I’m just real hurt by everything. I feel abandoned myself. I feel betrayed. I know the woman in my mom’s body is not my mom. She’s an addict. She knows what she’s doing is wrong but instead of turning and facing the wave, she’s blaming the wave for being there in the first place. It’s the piers fault, the beaches fault, anyone but herself. So instead of just admitting that it’s wrong and changing she is just diving deeper into it. I’m so sad for her. I’m sad for those being affected. I’m leaning a lot on Victoria and good friends. Talked a long time with my DAD and he gave some really good advice: Let go of the things you have no control over and leave it in God’s hands. It’s good advice, no?

Well so that’s what is going on in my life lately. Just trying to immerse myself in the gospel and playoff baseball and Victoria. I figure with those three things it will keep me from thinking about home.

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Revelations that should not be

Found some things out this weekend I wish I hadn’t been told but yet I’m glad I know all the same. I’ll reveal more details when the family has been informed. I don’t want to use this blog as a way of surprising people and since family reads this blog I must just say it’s a whopper. It’s had me thoroughly depressed the last two days BUT did not stop me from enjoying myself at Dodger Stadium this Saturday.

Now I’m a Padres fan and therefore you’d think I naturally hate the Dodgers and for most of my life I have. HOWEVER my buddy Scott (Booyah #1…Shaman Booyah…The Red-Headed Elvis…or just Scooter depending on who you are) is a strong Dodger fan. He detracted from the Padres after 1998 when the ownership sold out the fans by dumping players and duping us into voting on a proposition. Well that’s how Scott feels anyways. I’m still a fan of the team remember? ANYWAYS, he has been suffering for five years and finally got to see them win a division title…LIVE AND IN PERSON. In fact we had great field level seats down the 1st base line. Aisle 50, Row N, Seats 7&8.

Not only did we get to see them win but we saw a great game. We were down 3-0 going into the bottom of the 9th. I said we huh? OK THEY. THEY were down 3-0. Green singles, then a K by Alex Cora, and three consecutive walks brought LA their first run. Izturis then promptly grounded to short to start what should have been a 6-4-3 game ending double play. INSTEAD he boots it and another run scores making it 3-2 with one out and the bases loaded. A single by Jayson Werth (why can’t he spell EITHER name right?) tied the score and brought up Steve Finley. Now I remember April 10th, 1998. That night the Padres were down 4-2 going into the ninth. The crowd started cheering in the 8th when the Pads got a couple guys on but couldn’t finish the job. They NEVER SAT DOWN AND NEVER STOPPED CHEERING until about an hour after Finley hit a game winning grand slam off Felix Rodriguez. Now it would be Wayne Franklin’s turn. First pitch strike…and then…POP! Hands raised, crowd goes freaking nuts and Scott gets what he’s been waiting for in like forever. OK since 1999 but still.

That day he saw the Dodgers clinch, watched the scoreboard as the Angels clinch the AL West Crown, his alma mater UCLA trounced SDSU, AND he found a banner in the store of Hideo Nomo that used to hang in the city streets (along with other players) back in 1996 when he first got to drive around LA with friends. I will be honest and say I bought him a celebratory drink. He’d never had a Scorpion before but apparently he loved it. He went home a very happy (and slightly toasted) man. Couldn’t be more happy for a buddy. Well I could but I haven’t been in a long long time.

Along with that sports stuff GENERAL CONFERENCE of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints was held this weekend. We saw bits of the Saturday morning session and a lot of the Sunday sessions. This month when our Home Teacher stopped by he challenged us to come up with three questions, pray about them and listen to General Conference for the answers. Well it’s funny. The first question was answered by the very first speaker. The Second question I had AS WELL as the MAIN question Victoria had was answer by the Prophet, President Gordon B. Hinckley. My third question may have been answered in another talk. I’ll have to listen to them all again to see.

Just the fact that our questions were so important to the Lord that he had them answered in the talks was just amazing. Well to be honest these talks were probably written weeks in advance but the Lord brought my mind into a state that I was able to see specific answers in their talks that pertained directly to my questions. Really cool, huh? Apparently it never fails. Not doctrine questions like why are things this way or what about this or why don’t we do that…but deep spiritual questions on our own lives. They’re always answered in these Conferences.

I was a bit surprised Saturday morning to learn Elder Merril Bateman was not called as a new apostle. As I watched the Conference though I came to know for myself that the men who were called were worthy of such callings and I sustain them completely. Now I KNOW that it IS the Lord and not men who call these apostles. I tend to think if it were a position chosen by men that Elder Bateman may have found himself up there. Even if Elder Bednar was president of BYU-Idaho, Bateman was president of BYU-Utah and that position usually leads to apostleship. Perhaps one day but now wasn’t the time and it just strengthened my testimony in the church.

Love you guys. Take care and love one another.

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